So I've been cutting back on caffeine slowly over the past week or so. Made a whole fresh pot of decaf in the office kitchen this am, carefully mixed it 60-40 to regular coffee. 4 restless hours later realize that I made that decaf pot (it DID have an orange band around the top!) with REGULAR coffee. Duh. Should I apologize to rest of office decaf drinkers? Or chalk it up to helping them be prepared for Ike?

   
I haven't posted in a really long time, but enjoy looking at what all my peeps have to say on their blogs....
My sweet Maggie Moo has been gone for 2 and a half months. still can't quite grasp that.
Hope the bottom doesn't fall out when it hits me.

It’s Saturday morning. I'm listening to Car Talk and killing time until Maggie's acupuncture appointment. My house smells of sauerkraut, pickles, jalapenos, corn, lima beans, spinach... No - not an eclectic (and repulsive) stew simmering on the stove, it's about 5 pounds of canned vegetables that expired between 3 months and 4 years ago. For some odd reason I decided to check the expiration dates on the canned vegetables in my pantry at 3am this morning. (Insomnia makes you do odd things.)

Went back to bed, then began again at 9am. Instead of tossing 10 cans into the trash, I'm opening every can and dumping the contents into a strainer so the liquid goes down the drain instead of my trash bag. (Can’t recycle the cans if they’re still full, of course.) This is how I spend my time. Must find more compelling hobbies.

 So, I've ended up with a fascinating mish mash of vegetables in a strainer in my kitchen sink;
(and for the record, today’s date is May 3, 2008)

• 3 cans of whole spear asparagus (was a 4 pack from Costco), Best Used by July 2007
• 2 cans whole kernel corn (8 oz, easy open pop top) Best by Jan 31, 2007.
• lima beans, Best by Jan 31, 2007
• candied yams – no expiration date AT ALL- is that legal?- it's a mystery! (don't eat it - you're not that hard up for a meal)
• chopped spinach, Best by Dec 31, 2007
• sauerkraut, no expiry date, but inside and outside of can's bottom is slightly rusted
• sweet peas, Best by Jan 31, 2006

 I processed the cans, then moved over to the fridge doors. I’m on a roll.

• Vlasic Snack’mms kosher dills? I don't remember buying those. Amanda must have bought them when she lived here in December. So they're still good.... and pickles are low fat, low cal! (Peek at date, curiously located on the edge of the lid.) Best if used by Dec 2004. Oh. Probably won't eat those.
• Jar of sliced jalapenos, Best Use by July, 2006 (they were for some recipe I never made)
• Off brand barbecue sauce from my friend’s weird brother
• 7 bottles of mustard; 3 regular, 3 spicy brown, 1 honey mustard
• 2 packs of Gu – was into running last winter
• Various salad dressings, hot sauce, Pepto Bismol, 2 packets of soy sauce….
• Hershey’s chocolate syrup – now THAT’s staying, only a few months old

How accurate is an expiration date, anyway? Surely they fudge it a little bit to reduce the buying cycle. Would I chance it for a 97 cent can of lima beans?  I feel so guilty for having wasted all this stuff. Wasn't there an article recently about canned food being really bad for you anyway? But donating it to charity to ease my guilt re: waste is just wrong. Poor people don't need botulism added to their list of woes.

For the love of God! Get a grip - this is like, less than $25 worth of stuff. (My mother's voice in my head: "Jennifer Lee, just throw them out!" This is why she isn't invited over much; she refuses to accommodate my obsessing. The nerve!)

So it's gone, the 5-8 pounds of mush... what do normal people do with Saturday mornings?

As I am often prone to making things "meaningful", this feels like a shedding of old baggage, a letting go of the need to hoard, a willingness to clean out and change. Every thing in my home is a story to me, a memory. Some worthy of keeping. Many not. Goodness. Kitchen purging as spiritual growth.
So now my finances and weight and love life will fall into place, right. How easy was that?

From now on I'm buying fresh, locally grown produce.

I went to the Hyde Park Theater last night b/c I had gotten on the guest list to go see The Dick Monologues, Spike Gillespie's answer to The Vagina Monologues. It was hilarious and poignant and very well executed. It made me miss writing. And I WANT to perform. I wish being a small time actor in Austin, Texas paid the same as a corporate gig - man, I'd be so THERE!

It was a nice distraction from my millionth fucking heart ache since I've been single again these last 5 years. My heart hurts from losing Daniel. (Yes....the guy I made fun of 4 weeks ago - I actually kindof fell for the guy) I say our break up was mutual, because we mutually agreed that I want to be in a relationship, and he doesn't have time for one. Ouch. We broke up Saturday morning. I fell asleep that afternoon and dreamt that he came back over with a huge bouquet of flowers and a $25 Starbucks gift card and said "I'm so sorry - take me back, I could never let you go." Nothing says I'm sorry like a Starbucks gift card. Random.

I keep telling myself that I'm making room in my life for the right relationship. Had to delete his phone numbers out of my cell phone so I'm not tempted to call. Must.... retain.... dignity.....

My favorite advice/consolation offered up by my amazing friend Rosie:

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.
Don't be afraid to let this one go...

wow.

Newsletter Cancellation:
Hello - I bought my home 4 years ago. I DO NOT KNOW the Social Security number of the women who lived there before me and DIED 5 YEARS AGO.
I have tried to accomplish this cancellation by phone, but to no avail.
Surely I'm not the first person with this problem.

Please stop sending ARMY ECHOES to;

Edith L Danson
XXXX Alegria
Austin, Texas 79757-2937

As Edith is deceased, she no longer reads Army Echoes.

Thank you very much,
(I can no longer type my name on my blogs) Person

remember that life is beautifully absurd
nothing is too serious
i walk in a state of grace
i love and am loved
that is enough




more to come

You are The Star

Hope, expectation, Bright promises.

The Star is one of the great cards of faith, dreams realised

The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming, with water to quench your thirst, with a guiding light to the future. They might say you're a dreamer, but you're not the only one.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

You have no idea how proud I am that I was able to insert that into LJ!

The vet wants to check Maggie's liver enzymes(?) to see how she's handling all the arthritis medicine.
I had to follow her outside this morning and catch her "first urine of the day" with a soup ladle.
Bet you'll think twice next time I serve soup.

My dear, sweet, crazy old dad died 2 years ago today. I want to find the thing I wrote for his memorial and post it here, just to bring it back to life.
I miss him terribly. I've never deleted his phone number from my cell phone.
That's the first time I've admitted that.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/The-Organizer-Lady/

That is a link to a email reminder/inspiration note thingy that I get every day.
See if it strikes your fancy.

Had a good date yesterday with Dan from eHarmony. Very nice guy - wish me luck! :-)

What makes me feel most alive, what brings me joy:

 Dogs
Children
Music
Family
Community
Acting
Humor
Service
Affection
Appreciation
Color
Kindness
Teaching
Reading
Cooking (stop laughing)

 Needs of the world as I most keenly feel them:

Homelessness
Mental Illness
Recycling
Less Commercialism
Connection
Beauty
Hope
Education

If I type SOMETHING - it counts as a post, right?
Sorry - I'm still a bit slap happy after my race...

I used to hate red wine. Now I looove it.
Watching Hairspray (rented it from the kiosk at McDonald's)
My prom date seems to have faded away. His loss, right?

For months I've been saying - "I need to get on LiveJournal." I'm here. Merry Almost Christmas everyone! Thanks, Chris, for helping me get signed up. Now I need to get access to all my friends postings....